Parenting - privilege? or right?

I have found myself deeply challenged by this thing called 'parenting' lately. Well... that's not entirely true, If you are a parent you will know that from day one, there are challenges. Big or small, there are challenges! The difference I am finding with the challenges that  I am facing at the moment, is that there are no quick answers. There's no "how to" guide, and as much as I can ask advice from people around me - be it brilliant advice for sure, there is no clear cut solution at the moment!  I say 'at the moment' intentionally, because I do believe that I we will get to the bottom of this. 
For some of you that don't interact with us on a daily basis you are wondering what on earth I am talking about. I know. Sorry, I am probably not making much sense. Basically what I am talking about is the challenge of raising my child to be  a whole and well adjusted person who is able to stand confidently in the world being 100% assured of the fact that she is loved and cherished by the people in her life. But at the same time knowing her place and having boundaries that she knows not to cross and understands why she shouldn't cross them. Teaching her that it is OK to have feelings and an opinion but to know how to process those feelings and opinions without being plain rude or obnoxious! And in doing all of this, making sure that in the process, we don't damage or break pieces away from her little personality.
OK, so I know that this probably all sounds way to deep and yes, I know she is only 2. Well very nearly 3!
I am just so aware of how easy it is to do this wrong. So often we take the 'privilege' of parenting for granted and we think we can do what we like with it. Or sometimes we just don't bother to give it enough effort. 
As Emily is slowly getting bigger, I am seeing that these things need to start being implemented sooner rather than later. She is becoming her own little individual person already and is needing so much guidance - for her own sake. The world around them moves so fast and I often find myself forgetting that I don't just have a child in my care, I have a whole person in my care, with needs and feelings and fears. A person that is relying on me to help them grow through all these things. The responsibility is huge, and we need to not forget that.
So to those of you that walk this road closely with us - Thank you for all your love and support and your much needed advice. Thank you for supporting us as we try and do this the right way for our little (BIG) Emily, and thank you for seeing that  she is an individual and  for not expecting her to fit into a mould.  And thank you for supporting us as we try to mould and shape her into her own special and unique 'shape' :)  ....which she would probably tell you is an orange triiiiiiiiaaangggle!!!!  :D Just one of her favorite shape/color combinations.


As I am writing this, the little one in my tummy is doing her morning work out... in between hiccups. She is getting so big now, I can feel her rapid growth every day by the weight of my protruding bulge. Not long now and we can meet her. The latest update from the doc is that she weighs 2,2 kgs, judging by her measurements she is NOT looking like a diabetic baby, which is a totally awesome relief! And spoke with my diabetic specialist on Tuesday and he is 100% happy with all my blood sugar readings and blood results and is confident that all is looking good! Wished me all the best for the rest of my pregnancy - which is a big YAY, because it means that I don't have to see him anymore! Unless my daily readings suddenly change, in which case I will need to contact him. I believe they wont though, especially because I am beyond the 30 week mark where sugar levels would normally go crazy again.


So that's where I am for now. If it was all too intense... Take into account it was 4:30 in the morning when I started writing this... and I am hormonal! ;)

Photo taken by Bernice Griffiths. www.bettybake.com

it's a privilege, not a right.... but we do need to do our best to do it right....

Grey days...

These Grey days just don't do it for me. I am talking literally, not figuratively! Winter is officially 2 weeks away, yet it feels like we've been in the grips of winter for a month already. I don't mind the cooler mornings and the crisp fresh air that leaves the tip of your nose feeling blue and frozen. I also don't mind that there is no wind for most of the time - that is a welcome relief for sure! I do mind the Grey skies though! I cant stand that my house remains dark the whole day and there are very few moments where the light streams in through the windows. Its so sad, makes me want to spend the day in bed with a book and just pretend the day is actually night! BUT, we all know that with a two year old, (or any child for that matter), its just not possible!!! 

It is Emily's second day at school this morning. It is so cute to see how she gets so excited about it! I hope that it stays like that for her entire school career and that the novelty never wears off! Its amazing the things I can get her to do in the morning while getting her ready for school. Its like she transforms into a 'big, big' girl and the baby in her gets totally put away. The dummy gets put in the draw, the nappy comes off and goes into the bin and she starts to display more independence than she normally does! We get to the class room and its like I become invisible. Whether I am still there or not is totally irrelevant to her and the only reason she gives me kisses goodbye is to console me - not her! Crazy I tell you!
Its quite something to get my head around having some free time to myself in the mornings. Its kind of the a situation where there is so much that I want to do, I also don't want to do anything.I want to savor the time and and make it last as long as possible! And then there is the scary realization that there are only about 6 weeks of this 'me time' before this tummy princess is out and then I go back to having to wait more or less another 2 YEARS before I get me time in the mornings again! I really didn't think this age gap through very well did I! LOL, no turning back now and I am so excited about meeting this little one! Just wish that we could decide on a name already!!!! I Some how don't expect that we will until shes out in our arms! And even then, I have a feeling it might take a couple of days! sigh!

I hope that you all have a brilliant day and that the weather isn't too Grey where ever you are! I think that I will be spending the rest of my FREE morning, catching up on some scrap booking... maybe!

Toodles!

Baby update

Yesterday we had our 29 week checkup at the gynae. I am really enjoying the fact that the appointments are now getting closer together - Its always a sure sign that the big day is getting closer. 
Yesterday we also had to confirm with him that he is happy to do the delivery at Constantiaberg and isn't overly concerned about there being any complications with the baby.  He assured us that he is confident that all should go well and if there is any problem for some reason we can definitely request that the hospital transfers the baby to Red Cross Children's Hospital.  You are probably wondering why on earth I am worried about all this, and if you have read any of my previous posts you will know why. So it is a relief to know that if baby needs High Care we wont have her sitting in Constantiaberg for weeks running up an enormous bill. We are of course trusting and believing that all will go well and all this worrying would have been for nothing.These are all just back up plans - always good to have! Especially cause with Emily I refused to have a back up plan and things went horribly wrong. So call this over compensating if you like, I would rather be overly prepared than going in clueless.
So baby weighs 1500 grams at the moment. Doc expects that baby will be about 3,4 kgs when shes born, which makes me very happy! A nice change from the 4,1 kgs that Emily was when she was born. I am also very happy that I have only put on a total of 5,5 kgs so far in the pregnancy. I think for 7 and a half months that is pretty impressive. With Emily I put on about 30 kgs so I am REALLY happy that this time I have managed to keep it down. I hope that I don't start ballooning now towards the end though.... Will just have to try stay away from those yuuummmmmy hot chips!
Next thing on the to do list for next week is to take my hospital admission form in and book my bed. I am also wondering how soon I need to start washing baby clothes - Maybe wait for a couple of warm sunny days...... I think that's wishful thinking though, after all we are heading towards winter! Will just keeping waiting patiently for a tumble dryer.... sigh!

Hope you all have a fabuliss day! Enjoy the sunshine if you have any, and if its cold where you are - enjoy a good book and some snuggle time!
 

Klupklake please!

taken by Bernice Griffiths. see www.bettybake.co.za

So on Thursday, Leon got home from work  and was doing his usual looking around the kitchen thing for something nice to nibble on. He came through with a cupcake that he had found and was thoroughly enjoying it. Emily saw this and was rather perturbed that she didn't have one. She looked at Leon and rather earnestly decided to ask him for one. Being only 2 and feeling rather desperate, her plea came out somewhat entertainingly! She ran to Leon and said, "daddy, can I have a klupklake please."  At first he didn't really hear her and it was only after the 3rd of 4th time that he realized that she was asking him for something. In the meantime, her gran and I were in stitches as we watched this little desperate attempt to get a cup cake, oh sorry, I meant to say klupklake. She naturally couldn't understand what was so entertaining and was totally surprised when her dad eventually turned around and gave her a little, playful pat on the bum! After all, she was asking for a "klup-klake."
She did eventually get her klupklake... after all, how can you ignore that!? 
So thats just something small and cute to hopefully warm your heart and make you smile!


P.S, yes, you do say it like you spell it :p


Mwah

7 months and counting

This week is the official start of my 7th month. Time has gone so fast with this pregnancy and I am slowly starting to realize that this baby will be here soon soon! Last week was a very stressful week as my hospital plans got changed without me being able to do much about it. What was meant to happen at False Bay Hospital as a semi private C-section, then changed and I was told that I could not have it there and it had to be at Groote Schuur Hospital as they are the only government hospital that specialize in Diabetic Deliveries. My wonderful, caring husband then decided that no, I will be having the baby at Constantia berg Medi Clinic. So as you can imagine, with all this happening and all the hormones raging in my body, I didn't do very well last week, hence the silence. So sorry to all my eager readers :) 
With the new hospital plans and the realization settling in that I am having another baby and this time it will go smoothly, I have started to think more about all the little preparation things that I need to do.Things like actually book my hospital bed... would be a good start. I have finally managed to get the baby's cupboard and chest of draws sorted out and its all neat and ready. Well, it will probably all need to be washed again before the baby is born, but that is something that I think that I can handle.

As for Emily this week.... I think there is something in the air making her slightly crazy! For a child that is normally fairly chilled- ish, and who normally listens pretty well, something is blocking her ability to listen and hear this week and I think that I am going to go crazzzzzyyyyyy! I don't think that I have EVER repeated myself soooo many times in a day before and am starting to detest the sound of my own voice! What was very entertaining this afternoon though, was Emily was being rude and cheeky and having a tantrum, so instead of talking to her a thousand times I decided instead of wasting my breathe I would just take her straight to her room and put her on her bed to sit there until she had calmed down. Every time I walked away, she got off her bed and ran behind me screaming. I would then turn around and put her back on her bed. Saying nothing. She was so annoyed by the fact that I wasn't talking to her that eventually she was pleading, "talk to me mommy, please talk to me." My plan had worked!!! I won! She soon realized that her behavior was not going to be rewarded with endless negotiating and debating. If she wasn't going to listen I was going to ignore her until she did! and it worked! She quickly calmed down and apologized. And the house went back to peace.... for a little while anyway! 
So I think that this is how I will be trying it for a while! .. mainly because I am running out of words! Please don't get me wrong, we so do believe in hidings!! I just don't think that everything deserves a hiding because they become numb to it and eventually the hidings stop working! ...besides, hidings from dad always seem to work a little better!! ;) 

There you have it, that's my story for now! Sorry if it wasn't very exciting but I'm tired and going to be going to get some sleep! well between the hot flushes (if you can call them that), the toilet trips, the bouncy baby in my tummy, the slight carpel tunnel syndrome I have in my wrists at the moment,  and all the strange pregnancy dreams! Not exactly peace and tranquility if you ask me!? 
Anyway, night everyone!
 

Dont insult the "mummum"

For those of you that know my daughter, you'll know that she calls her bottle 'mum-mum.' Its a word that she came up with all on her own, and in fact Leon and I were sitting thinking last night about when and how this happened and we really cant remember!
Anyway, the reason I'm writing about the mum-mum is that something happened yesterday, that was not the first time and it really annoyed me!
I was standing in a queue in Clicks yesterday, Emily was tired because it was getting close to her nap time - so she had asked me for her mum-mum. So there's my two and a half year old sitting drinking her bottle and yes I know that at two and a half she should be off the bottle. But I also know my child and I know that for the most part at home she drinks out of a cup. I also know that as much as I have tried, she does not like those sippy cups - I have tried virtually every kind. So this is not something that I am stressed about. We allow her to have her bottle for nap time and bed time, and then through the day she has it mainly when we are in the car or out.
ANYWAY, this is the annoying part! What is it with people, mainly woman, who seem to have this urge and think that its OK to look at my daughter and say things like, "oh my, you still drink out a bottle," or " why do you still drink out a bottle, you are a big girl!" Do they seriously think that my child, or an other child that they might direct this at, gives two hoots whether they should or shouldn't be drinking out a bottle or not. Do they not realize that this comment that is 'supposedly' directed at the child, is in fact directed at the mother, and do they not realize that the mother is fully aware of this! All  this person is doing is creating an enemy (slight exaggeration) for themselves because they have just insulted the mother in so many ways! Firstly, they have judged the mothers child raising way and ability, probably without even knowing it! Secondly, in making this comment they have not acknowledged you as a mother standing there, and any attempt that you might make to create eye contact is totally avoided. Making the situation even more annoying and offensive!
Why can these people just walk past and comment on her adorable curls or beautiful eyes? Why do they feel they have a right to pass some sort of judgment (be it small), on you and your child!? I cannot explained how when this happens I have to tie my feet with imaginary straps to the ground, and not fly at this person and in the end leave her standing there as a grown woman with a massive bottle and dummy stuck to her face! Super glued in fact! Yes, yes, I know I m hormonal and pregnant , and you are all probably shaking your heads in disbelief that something so trivial could annoy me - but it does! 
So just a tip to any of you that tend to like to make comments like this in passing - DON'T! For your own sake! If you want the world (of mothers) to be a happier place - don't insult the mum-mum!

Moans aside - hope that you all have a brilliant weekend doing whatever it is you plan to do! Thank you for reading!

Bye :)

Photo taken by Bernice Griffiths. www.bettybake.co.za

Rain Rain Go Away

So I think that today was probably the first really rainy day for the year so far and a definite sign that winter is approaching. I was very chuffed that I managed to accomplish everything that I set out to do - including clean the garage and clean the inside of my car. 
Emily on the other hand was not that impressed with the weather and this morning at about 8 o'clock stood standing at the sliding door, in her cute little barbie panties and her too short T-shirt  - singing in the saddest and slowest voice she could muster up, "rain rain go away, come again another day. Barneys friends all want to play, rain rain go away!" I think she may even have sniffed and wiped away an imaginary tear at the end of the song! (Wouldn't put that past my daughter and her dramatics!)

Anyway, so at about 9 o'clock she was still moaning about the weather so I decided to let her have a little rain experience. Out came the wellington boots and her big pink jacket and my enormous umbrella. Her face lit up with so much excitement when she realized that she was going to get to go and play outside in the rain. 
So out she went, singing her little song to anyone that could or would hear her. 


Yes, you are probably wondering how long the umbrella holding lasted.... not very long. She soonish realized that it was far to heavy for her little arms and if she put it down she would not only have two hands free, but she would also get wet!!!!! Double excitement! An exciting, muddy morning!


So that was our rainy day! Hope you enjoyed yours!